Confessions of a Fed Up Music Producer

I think the year had to be either 2006 or 2007 and it was when Stones Throw records was running the indie hip hop scene. They had this compilation album they did with Adult Swim called Chrome Children and it came with a dvd. On the dvd, there were interviews with Madlib(the Jay-Z of the label) and Peanut Butter Wolf(the founder). I will never forget what Peanut Butter Wolf said in his interview, because it was very chilling and it made me think twice. He said, Don't get into music unless you really really really really love it. And he went on to talk about great artists that no one had ever heard of or ones that have never got their proper shine. At times and especially now, I think I should have taken precautions when I started making beats and meeting rappers. Had I known from the beginning that people in the hip hop side of the music business could be so selfish, hypocritical, contradicting, and sneaky, I would have focused my energies and new gained talent somewhere else(like I'm doing now). It took 3 years to get to this point and I'm sad to say that it took this damn long.

I guess that is the price of being optimistic and a dreamer. When I started making beats, I did it because I wanted to see if I could make my own music. I was a writer before that(still am) I wrote raps, everyone did. But music was something else. My immediate influences just gave me a type of energy to just always want to make music and eventually carve out my TRUE dream of producing whole albums with rappers(and now bands, singers and whoever else)and eventually going on the road and touring around the world(the fame and the money will come later) Down the road, I formed a group, it changed members, I met rappers who loved the beats, but didnt want to pay, I met ones online who I felt I could trust and liked them enough to hear them on my beats. But unless you know and have actually met the person you work with, you should not trust AT ALL that anything will ever get finished. I had to learn this from too many different experiences. It is very disheartening when it happens but I have taken it now as HUGE learning lesson. You really can not depend on too many people in the music business, not even the business part, lets just say the artistry part. You cant even trust a person who you feel, really loves the music as much as you do, because of course, everyone is looking out for self. I understand that, its a business. Its America. But that does not mean you step on peoples toes and make empty promises and predictions to people who are just as motivated and in it for the love in joy as much as you claim to be. So at this point what to do you? Do it yourself I guess. Hopefully link up with people you can trust and who support you no matter what, make music with them, and blindly hope for the best.

There have been so many times where I wanted quit music and just write and there probably will be some more times i will want to quit, even if i gain success. But for the time being, I will take what I have learned and do my thing with people I can trust and I feel good with. Even writing this gives me more clarity.

F.B.